Monday Monday

First off let me say thank you for all the kind comment on my last post. Thank you for your prayers. I can feel them and they are helping.

Saturday morning I awoke feeling better. Lighter. Plus, I had a salon appointment for a hair cut. Bonus. After my hair appointment I got a pedicure. Whoa. I was feeling much better. Then, Sunday happened. Church with the family is always a mood booster. Then after church I took Mr. P along with two of his buddies to see Madagascar 3. I sat eating popcorn and candy and laughing hysterically with the boys. It was a very funny movie! A very good weekend and my mood had improved severly. I was relaxed.

Then MONDAY happened. Why? Why? Why Monday, do you have to be like that? What's up with you? I'm divorcing Monday. Yep. Well, actually I think it will be more like a separation. You see this is the last Monday of the school year (praise the heavens).

I woke up with a cold. Stuffy nose, sore throat. Blah. I had a crabby argumentative 8 year old....to the power of 10. Ugh. I decided to walk the kids to school so I could get some exercise. We headed off late because my adorable 6 year old couldn't find his shoes (the ones that are supposed to be in the shoe closet). He eventually had to wear black dress shoes (with white athletic socks, shorts and t-shirt). Yes. This goes against all fashion rules I have set for my children but the alternative was snow boots.

We had to walk fast and numerous times I had to yell direct the boys to NOT walk in front of the stroller....or I would bump them. Then we got to school and the crabby 8 year old walked off without kissing me goodbye. If I didn't have the dog with me I would have chased him down the hall and given him the BIGGEST lip lock of his life. That will teach you to not kiss you mom goodbye.

As I was standing enjoying the time to catch my breath I heard my phone ring. It was my MIL. I answered and had a moment of confusion wondering why she wanted to know when I'd be home. Suddenly I remembered! Oh! CRUD (not the word I really used)! The thought raced into my head I HAVE A DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT!! Arghhhhhhhhh! I quickly looked at my watch, 9:15. Appointment time, 9:30. My MIL was waiting at my house to watch the little ones.

As I raced home as top speed I realized I had not even had a shower yet. AND...this was THE appointment. You know...the yearly! The pap! The one where you shower for an extra 10 minutes, shave, deodrant, lotion, etc. Ugh!

I whipped into my driveway with the stroller wheels on fire. It was now 9:30. I tried to call my doctor's office...got the recording machine...accidently didn't hang up my phone and left a message saying how annoyed I was that nobody was answering the phone. Awesome!

I ripped my clothes off, jumped in shower, shaved my legs, washed...good enough, and hopped out. Dried, put my sweaty clothes back on and ran to the car. Time 9:35. And Cam...No, this does not prove that I can get ready in 5 minutes all the time.

I called on my way (yes, broke the law) and told them I was on my way. Arrived in office at 9:42. Whew! I was taken right back. Hmmm....maybe there is something to being late. NO waiting. Had my appointment. No blood work since I had eaten. But to top off the whole morning...I got a shot! Owie!

By the time I left I was ready for dinner and pj's. There was a lull in the middle of the day until I sat around too long and suddently realized it was time to LEAVE for swimming lessons. Here we go again.

So, you see Monday and I are breaking up. It's over...at least until September.

Tuba's Picnic

Today I had lunch in the park. The little ones and I went to Tuba's end of the year picnic. All the kids in Tuba's class, the teachers, the aides and many families joined together. The "kids" are all high school age 14-21. I love to see these kids together, playing and socializing. I love to meet their families and catch up with the ones I know. I have watched these kids grow up along with Tuba. Many of the kids have been together in the same class since they were in preschool. Wow have they gotten big!

Hmmmm....I've sat here at my computer for an hour trying to decide what to say next. I've written and deleted numerous times. I've teared up. And sat here some more. I don't know how to put out there what I'm feeling.

Since I don't seem to know where I'm going with this I'll start by telling you some of the things I saw today.

I saw a Dad take his big teenage son out of his wheelchair and carry him to a slide and then release him so he could go down. He did it several times and the boy was thrilled. It made me tear up to watch.

I saw a kid with fresh scabby scars circling his head from a recent surgery.

I saw a mom pushing her daughter on the swings....a daughter who is almost as big as her mom.

I saw four kids lined up in wheelchairs watching the others run around because their wheelchairs can't go in the wood chips.

I saw an aide blow up a ball and play with Tuba.

I saw a girl having a big seizure while her aides attended her.

I saw George and Sis run around and play. They were so comfortable around these kids.

I saw a dad lovingly feeding his daughter. He chuckled when she swatted his hand away because she didn't want what was offered.

That's what I saw. Here's is what I feel. Joy, Sadness, Hope, Uncertainty and Love.

I don't know why I am struggling emotionally. I think it is that I don't know what the future will bring for Tuba...or for these other kids. Right now they are in a great school with an amazing teacher. They have a stimulating program. They have fun! These kids have individualized programs to meet their needs.

At 21 they will all leave school. And then what? Some will be able to work. Some will live on their own. Most will get some money from SSI (if the budget still allows). But, even with jobs and federal help most of these kids will live close to or in poverty. Some, like Tuba have families with the financial means to keep them at home. But is that going to be a fulfilling life?

I don't know what kind of "job" Tuba will be able to do. I want him to have stimulation in his life....not just sit at home. I know other kids from Tuba's program, kids who aged out of the school, who are doing just that...sitting at home. Stuck. It makes me sad, and scared.

In our local paper a special education teacher wrote a letter on this same topic. He suggested that kids/people like Tuba should be in "school" forever...not cut off at 21. He stated that learning goes on for life. I agree with him. I wish there were more options.

I'm struggling....to put this post together so it makes sense. I'm struggling with Tuba's future. I'm struggling today.

My Girl

Sis is nutty fun! She makes me laugh out loud. Her zany, fun, opinionated style of dress is a hoot. She marches to the beat of her own drum. If the outfit is REALLY off the chart I don't sweat it too much. She will change within the hour anyway... a few times.

Not For Me

I went to see my dermatologist. Time for the annual skin check. After a VERY thorough exam she removed a mole from my leg (pathology was normal). Then we talked about my skin. I have used retinol products to help keep my skin clear but they are causing red irritation. More like flaming swollen itchy skin. Darn! My Doctor informed me that I am just too sensitive to them. Great. Not only did they help with acne but also wrinkles. Gotta love having acne AND wrinkles.

So, she gave me a new prescription and then we talked about wrinkles. It went like this.

Me: Can you recommend a good eye cream for wrinkles.

Doctor: with a straight face after looking right at my forehead...Botox is really a better option for you.

Yep. Okay. Wow.

And on top of that fun visit I have been plagued with other lovely signs of aging. I DO NOT like it. Nope.

I'm not a fan of grey hair. Not even a little. I want to pluck it out except I think bald patches will be even less attractive.

Would you like to know what is even worse? Grey hair in my eyebrows. Ugh. So sad. And my eyebrows have gone all wonky. Weird. Unmanageable. Bristly and wacko. Who knew? I sure as heck didn't know that possessed eyebrows awaited me.

I'm going to go put on loud Disco music and dance with my kids. Dance it out. That will surely make me feel young.

Baby George told me this week that he does NOT want me to get old. So....I'm not going to!

The picture above. What does it have to do with this post? I don't know. Posts without pics are just so boring to me. This pic is of Skunk Cabbage I saw on a recent field trip with Busy Guy. If I have kid in Kindergarten (and a few younger ones too) I can't really be old enough for grey hair and Botox. Right? I knew you'd agree.

Swept Away

I know I said I've been having some amazing weekends....but....this one beats all! My sweet hubby planned a get away for us....in secret! I did know about it before hand but all the planning was done. Very exciting! He whisked me away for an overnight cycling trip. Wheeeeeee!

This is only the fourth time in 16 years that we have gone away overnight together from our kids. Much needed!! We left early Saturday morning to catch a ferry. We stayed in a friend's guest house. Great price and lovely home! It was right in town so we were able to ride our bikes everywhere we went.

As an added bonus Cam bought me a gift. Cycling shoes and new pedals so I can clip on....or in other words be a real cyclist. I also bought some new cycling clothes. No more old yoga sweats. I now look the part! Plus, I'll stay much drier when it rains and/or get sweaty. Fancy fabric is fabulous!

We cycled to lunch on Saturday and then headed out for a BIG ride. We did about 20 miles. The views were so beautiful. God created such a breathtaking place for us to live. It was SO quiet (no kids) and the birds were chirping away. Fantastic fun time! I got lots of practice clipping in and out...and only fell hard once. The other time I just screamed and grabbed onto Cam. Isn't that what I was supposed to do?

After our ride we changed clothes and went out for a YUMMY dinner. New York Steak with Gorgonzola and reduced port wine sauce with a potato cake....and an apple nut salad....and a delicious bottle of wine....and hazelnut chocolate mousse. I was full! Thanksgiving kind of full! Good thing I rode my hiney off today kind of full.

Sunday morning I woke up to a text from Mr. P...."I'm up now Mom". Ummm, okay....I guess I'm up too now buddy. :) We cycled to breakfast and then rode around town looking at all the Victorian houses. Very fun.

Before we left I was very nervous about being away from the kids. VERY! But, as the hours went by I relaxed and enjoyed myself so much. I didn't want to come home by Sunday afternoon. Nope. I could easily have stayed another night. Yep. Love my kids but the time away was so nice. And quiet. And much needed.

The kids had a great time with Grandma Sue. Thanks Sue!! You are a marriage preserver. We really appreciate it.

And Cam...thank YOU! Thanks for sweeping me off my feet once again. I love you. XO

Summer

Summer is coming!

We have a few weeks left of school. We don't get out this year until almost the end of June. Then, the wide open days of summer.

Of course I want to cram as much fun into those days as possible. Nice weather and family time and so many places to go and things to see.

We have swim lessons booked, a family vacation, a weekend trip to see family over the mountains. Family coming to stay with us. And 4 birthdays comin' up! The Birthday Season!

And....I want numerous days lounging at the beach, running in the sprinkler at home, cycling in the sun, picnic dinners in the park, many many bonfires and desserts of s'mores, and late mornings spent in our pj's sitting on the porch in the sun.

We also plan to go camping at least once, get out and explore hiking trails and just spend our days with our feet up and the sun on our face.

I had to tell you about all the fun we are going to have because I've also declared this summer, "Manner's Summer". Yes, I'm so fun. We will be working on manners. Yes, welcome to Mama's Charm School. :)

Ummmm.....why Charm School? Let's just cover what I witnessed yesterday. It's a good example of what I've been seeing lately. Okay. Lack of please and thank you numerous times, numerous kids. Loud burps and then the statement, "good one!". Huh? Farting and then announcing the fart and asking if anyone can smell it! Yep. Using the word "butt" WAY too many times...also heard...."buttcrack" a few times too. Oh. General potty talk....poop poopy poop. Table time....standing in chairs at the table, crouching in chair, wiping hands on the underside of table...or shirt...or mom. And lastly interrupting. Interrupting. Interrupting.

You aren't laughing are you? That would be bad manners.

Brothers

Cam took this picture last week. Hilarious. One little twin bed, two big kids and one crabby cat.

Look how much they've grown...HERE and HERE and HERE and oh they are going to be mad at me when they are older for this one HERE

Camp out Cook out

We have been having some amazingly fun weekends. The kind of weekend that leaves me dead tired on Mon. morning. The I need a weekend from my weekend kind of fun. The weather is still a bit rainy and cool but it's getting nicer and that means we head outdoors!

This past weekend our fabulous friends Vern and Cheryl (or Cereal as Sis calls her) invited us to join them at their campsite. We live in a beautiful area and the drive was spectacular. Water and islands and huge bridges and green pastures and forests and mountains! Oh My!

The campground is an old Fort for the military. The kids loved exploring the old concrete bunkers. Me? Nope.

The Fort is perched right on a bluff overlooking the water. Beautiful.

We hiked a luscious trail down to the beach and played. We LOVE the beach! There was no wind and it was majestic and peaceful. I could have sat there all day. The sound of the waves rolling in puts me in a relaxation trance.....not often I can find that kind of relaxation.

Then it was bonfire and hot dog time....followed by s'mores....of course.

We got home that night really late. We were all exhausted from such a good time. We flopped into bed smelling smoky from the campfire. I love that smell!

Thank you to Cheryl for all these pics! I didn't take my camera down to the beach.