We are always asked if we are done or if we are going to have more kids. Hmmmmm. I ask myself this question a lot too. We talk about it and pray about it. Two years ago when we had two new babies we planned to adopt one more baby girl...around this time. Now that we have two two-year olds we have changed our mind. I've always said that newborns are WAY easier than toddlers...any age is easier than toddlers...except maybe teenagers but I haven't had to go there yet (since Tuba is a toddler in his mind and actions it's really as if we have 3 toddlers!). Okay, 3 toddlers...one who is as tall as I am....I think that is enough to make anyone be DONE!
I feel very content with our family. I feel very busy and very stretched and very tired at the end of the day. I am at my limit. I don't want to pull myself so thin that I cannot be the mom I want to be (some days I'm not doing it now). I want my kids to have what they deserve from me.
I thought I would want two girls...who would play together. But, I feel very happy and very content with one girl. She does have me after all. :) At this point our van is full, our house is more than full and most of all our hearts and hands are FULL!!
But, you knew there had to be a but coming. Only God knows what's in store for us. Only God knows how many children we will have. And...it's not something that has to be decided now or tomorrow. Back when we only had Tuba we could never have imagined the family we now have. We do not know what next year or 5 years from now will bring us. We may be done and we may not be. For today we are content and not making plans for any more kids. That is today and only God knows what the future will hold.
Previously I wrote about my special rose bush. Well this summer I was watching and waiting to see what the bush would tell me. It wasn't looking very good....I'm no gardener. I thought maybe it wouldn't bloom at all this year. Could it be a message from God that we are indeed done?? But, just when I had that thought I noticed that the bush began to form buds. How many would it get, one, two? I was amazed to see that the bush produced 5 perfect buds. Wow! Does this mean we will have 5 more babies?? I didn't think so. I think those 5 buds are the beautiful children we already have. If you think I'm crazy...please go read my link. You might still think I'm crazy...and you may be right...but at least this will all make sense.
So the bush bloomed with 5 beautiful roses. After the roses faded I decided to cut back the stalk and get it ready for next year's season. Low and behold there are now two more buds. So...2 more kids...or maybe roses for Cam and I?? Only God knows.