Friday, April 1, 2011

The Future

It's no secret that I love to plan. I like to think about what next year will be like, or what I'll be doing in 5 years, 10 years, etc.

For Confession Friday I'll confess that I've been very stressed out thinking about the future. Specifically Tuba's future after he is done with high school. Tuba gets to go to high school until he is 21 years old. But, after that there is a BIG question mark. ??? His teacher recently sent home a questionnaire asking what kinds of things we have planned for Tuba's future. Like will he live at home or in a group home...will he go on to higher education...will he work...what type of work do you see him doing??? I broke out in a sweat and got all dizzy. Ugh!

We know that Tuba will live at home with us. We know he will not be capable of riding a bus alone or doing any kind of job without constant supervision. What we do not know is what kinds of programs are out there for him. It's time to start looking into it. It's hard for me to envision what my life will look like because I have no idea what Tuba will be doing. He has been in school since he was 3 years old so it will be a HUGE adjustment.

Recently someone asked me if I planned to return to teaching once Baby George was in school full time. It got me thinking and I would like to go back at least part time. Then I realized that I would have 2 years with all the kids in school and then Tuba would be done. Hmmm. I just don't know.

I have been laying awake at night and thinking about all of this. Did you know that Baby George will graduate high school in 2027? That there will be only one year when our 4 youngest are all at the elementary school (grades K, 1, 3 and 5). That for 3 years we will have kids at the elementary, middle and high school. That in 2023-24 we will have 3 kids in high school....which also means we will have 3 kids in college a few years later. Wow...that will be expensive!

Anyway my brain is overloaded but we will start looking at various options for our sweet Tuba. I tell myself that figuring out what to make for dinner tonight or getting a sitter for my Dr. appt. are more pressing matters. But, I can't help wondering what my day will look like...and how I'll get to the gym...and how I'll stimulate and entertain Tuba...and how I'll volunteer at the kids' schools...and how I'll run errands...and....and...and...


  1. And your family will help. Don't forget that, my love, your family will help.

  2. I emailed you once before and have posted a couple of times. We have 4 kids adopted from S. Korea. Our daughter came to us at age 4 and has special needs. She has some autistic-like behaviors (probably learned in the orphanage) but she is also intellectually disabled. She started in an autism classroom at school (she is 6 now so in kindergarten) but was moved to a categorical MR classroom in Jan. She is doing well there!

    It has been an interesting journey trying to figure out what special needs she has since she was 4 when we met her and she didn't speak English. So even though she is 6 we have only had 2 years of being parents of a child with some special needs. We are learning as we go.

    My question is (and I don't mean it judgmentally AT ALL), why are you guys planning to keep Tuba living with you as an adult rather than looking at group homes? You have much more experience with this than we do, but we find ourselves learning toward looking at a group home for Holly (our daughter) someday. We have several friends whose adult children with special needs live in good group homes, even Christian group homes. I have an adult cousin who also lives in a group home and it works well for him and his folks.

    Just curious (again, NOT JUDGING YOU GUYS) about your plans and why you feel this way.

    Thanks for whatever you feel comfortable sharing. You have a beautiful family! BTW - the post about working in lingerie was hilarious, and disturbing!! ;-)

    Carrie T. - mom to 4 from Korea
    You can't email me if you'd rather:



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